Organic Hot Peppers

Hot Pepper Powder

Q: You want to know an amazing topping for that Wal-Mart Tombstone pizza you just bought, because you don’t feel like spending three hours cooking that awesome pad thai dish, on which you spent $100 for the ingredients?

A: The organic hot pepper powder you made at the end of the summer from all of those organic hot peppers you grew in your organic garden, jerk.

Organic Hot Peppers
Fuck yeah

Oh wait, that was me. Not you. You spent $44 on pepper plants at Lowe’s because you’re too much of a grab-asser to save your own seeds. Well, even with your crappy peppers, you can still make hot pepper powder. Here’s how:

What You Need:

1. Food dehydrator. You can do so much awesome shit with one of these.

Food Dehydrator
Pretty cheap on Amazon

2. Hot peppers. Don’t be a sissy.

Peppers in the Dehydrator
Fuck yeah

3. Culinary scissors. Or regular scissors. I typed “culinary scissors” because I’m a stupid asshole. And you don’t get a picture of these, and I’m not going to tell you why. You can just sit there and fucking think about it.

4. Spice or Coffee Grinder. I use my wife’s coffee grinder. She likes it when I do that. This one is awesome:

Coffee/Spice Grinder
Coffee/Spice Grinder

How To Do It:

1. Remove the stems from the peppers (I do this right after I pick them, and right before I freeze them).

2. If they are bigger peppers, cut them into segments. They’ll dehydrate faster. I cut the Jalapenos and Habaneros in half, but I leave the Tabascos in tact because I fucking feel like it.

3. Dehydrate the peppers and wait for a long ass time. Because I told you to.

Dehydrated Hot Peppers
Fuck yeah

Dehydrated Cayenne Peppers

4. Once the peppers are dehydrated, grind them up, and put the powder in a jar.

Hot Pepper Powder
Fuck YEAH!!!

5. Jizz hot pepper powder all over your food and pretend like you’re enjoying “hot mouth” in front of your questionably hot girlfriend.

3 comments

  1. Pingback: Homemade Garlic Hot Pepper Aphid Spray | The Raging Gardeners
  2. Anonymous

    Very good pictures. Like the technique. Something about the delivery of your information gave the impression of a confused Christian. Let the string bean be your guide into a reality without a god that needs a devil to make him relevant but rather a pickleworm needs a squash to make it evil. Fuck HOAs fuck em to the compost pile.

  3. Pingback: How to Dehydrate and Preserve Hops | The Raging Gardeners

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